Believe me, I’ve looked and looked all throughout the internet on finding a piece on how to deal with online hate (not that I did NOT use the word “criticism”, we’ll get to that shortly) as a language enthusiast. Perhaps surprisingly, there wasn’t any, and it is high time one got written.
I’m not gonna lie, I’m very sensitive to what other people say about me in my HEART, even though in my HEAD I know that I shouldn’t care. After all, whose judgment am I going to trust about my language skills: Richard Simcott (who told me that I spoke the Scandinavian Languages “very, very well” and was also impressed by my commitment to Greenlandic and languages of Oceania) Nanook (who also though I spoke Greenlandic and Danish well) many other famous polyglots whom I’ve met OR randos on the internet who write barbed comments?
I’ve developed deep friendships with people with virtually no English (only a handful of cases in which no English was used at all because, well, the person in question didn’t speak it, but usually my English-free friendships sometimes have to switch to English if there are others that don’t speak the target language who want to join in). I’ve had teachers, professors and native speakers compliment my accent. I KNOW I’m not a fake and that I’m good at what I do, although I have had my share of failures.
However, sometimes one comment somewhere accusing me of reading off the screen / not speaking the languages as well as I do / telling me that speaking 17 languages is “impossible” (anyone who has ever studied very closely related languages at all will know that it IS possible) / any number of things gets under my skin somehow.
This was because, throughout my life, I’ve been very much bred to please people. I know I’m not the only one, and I really need to break out of it and I KNOW that I have to, but it is a difficult journey made even more difficult by insensitive people who say “if you don’t like something about your personality, then just change it!”
Okay, enough ramblin’, let’s find out how to ensure that you are NEVER affected by online hate, ever, ever AGAIN! (A follow-up piece to this will be written about in-person haters).
The first thing to understand is that haters are NOT Critics.
Examples of criticism would include:
“I think your accent needs work. The syllable stress is something to pay attention to. Good luck with (insert language here) in the future.”
“Great work! A minor thought to consider for the future: perhaps your choices of sentences could be a bit more original in your next video. Keep it up!”
“Your (insert language here) does have significant problems, but keep at it!”
Examples of hate would include:
“You’re just a fake polyglot who memorize a couple of sentences and calls him/herself fluent!”
“Your (language) is awful!”
Spot the difference? Of course you do.
Criticism acts to build people up. Hate just simply knocks people down. As a friend of mine said about online haters, “they need more love in their lives”.
One thing to understand about haters is that the very fact that they sling such remarks actually indicates dissatisfaction with their language progress. There’s a reason that I don’t go around accusing people of reading off the screen or using Google Translate or having bad accents even if there’s a part of me that may think that to be true. That’s because I’m busy building up my OWN skills. (And even if they DID do things like that, honestly, who cares?)
Yes, I think some people in the online Polyglot community could “diversify” their language choices a little bit, but I never write anything to that effect on comment sections because, again, setting a good example with my own work would be more effective to that end.
Haters are dissatisfied with their life and progress and, seeing no way out (when in fact there IS one), take it out on people on in Internet enjoying the success they wish they had.
A person online who constantly accused me of being fake in my videos, inflating my skills, and telling me that speaking the languages that I do was impossible, well…suffice it to say that he tried to present himself as an expert on a language which he failed the proficiency test in. Multiple times, in fact. The fact that he tried to take it out on me just simply shows wasted effort and dissatisfaction with his life. I wish this person great luck in all of his language journeys, because I know that having these setbacks can be difficult, but hurtful comments only make you look desperate, wounded and actually…just plain silly.
The same also goes to people who agree with haters as well (e.g. people who like their YouTube comments).
Also, keep in mind that just because haters may be native speakers of a language you speak, that doesn’t mean that their opinion is valid, because as any experienced language learner knows, native speakers can have diverging opinions on what makes an L2 speaker “good”. Obviously the better you get, the higher the percentage of people who think you’re good will be, but even with your native language you can’t please everyone (e.g. some people think that I’m not a native English speaker when I am one). This is even MORE true with a language split across political lines (as global languages are wont to be).
There’s a reason that highly successful people, in the language-learning world and otherwise, have never questioned my language skills at all (demonstration or no demonstration), and that’s because there’s satisfaction with their lives. Sure, some may think that maybe I may be overestimating myself a bit, but they never voice that explicitly, much less on the Internet. That’s because satisfied people don’t “hate”.
Especially haters trying to tell you that are fake are trying to tell themselves that they need not be threatened by their success. Over the course of the past few years, yes, sometimes I have felt threatened by the success of other people, but with each coming year I’ve shrunk it and I’m continuing to shrink it.
And haters actually do an EXTREME disservice to humanity, preventing people who would otherwise show their true selves and their true skills to the world from ever flourishing. So if you’ve EVER written anything like the hate comments I mentioned above, please stop. Forever. Because it doesn’t say anything good about you and, to be honest, most sane people are going to see right through your hate for what it is—a poorly managed bandage function on your OWN dissatisfaction.
The hate is ALWAYS about the person who writes it. It is never about you, especially if you intend to keep on climbing higher and higher. The End.
You’ve got to stay determined!