Introducing My World, My Everything: WwLW’s Relationship Advice Column for Multilinguals and Language Learners

April is here and with it, as with the beginning of every month,  comes an opportunity for introspection.

So as some of you know I have two primary spheres of my life filled with multilingualism.

One of these is my freelancing business which involves both translating and teaching. Another one of them involves the various language social events I attend on a weekly basis.

There is one aspect of crossover that is had in both of these spheres and that is the fact that often I encounter people who learn languages for the sake of love – either love they’ve found already, or love they seek to find.

It is one of the primary reasons, according to some, that people undertake language learning to begin with. Over half of my students have sited a partner as the primary motivation to learn their target language.

There have only been a handful of articles and podcasts I’ve seen address this topic, among them pieces by Benny Lewis and Olly Richards, and here I am ready to announce “My World, My Everything”, which is going to be a spinoff blog launching on Tu B’av (the Jewish “Valentine’s Day”) later on this year (some time in the summer, I’m too lazy to check a calendar).

The primary focus on the blog is going to be relationship advice, primarily for established couples given that this is one of my primary sources of clientele. But there will also be advice for single multilinguals as well.

Here are some topics I’ll be addressing, feel free to suggest some of your own:

  1. Is there a sexiest language? (Hint: not really, the ones you are passionate about the most will make your personality radiate when you speak them).
  2. How to use your significant other as a human instant fluency pill.
  3. How to use your languages or your national / ethnic background to bolster your attractiveness (most of these principles are not gender-specific).
  4. The do’s and don’t’s of learning a language because you fancy a particular native speaker / a nationality in general.
  5. How to convince your beloved to use his or her native language with you (even if s/he wants to use another language instead).
  6. How to be the best language teacher your boy/girlfriend could ask for.
  7. How to find heart-melting ultra-sappy love songs (and the like) in your partner’s target language. Oh, and how to use it properly.
  8. How to learn a language together.
  9. How to make cultural gaps and differences a source of love rather than a source of tension.
  10. How to use languages to repair your relationship, to recover from fights or to get your ex back together with you.

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AND LASTLY…

Some of you may know books that deal with culture differences in general. Some of these books I highly recommend checking out include “When Cultures Collide” as well as the “Xenophobes’ Guides” (these are humorous) as well as the “Culture Smart!” books.

A number of relationship guides for various cultures are also in the world, ones that will seek to foster mutual understanding and a spirit of undying love with people across cultures from all over the world.

What are some of the nationalities you’d like to see covered in this series? Let me know!

Anything else you’d like to see covered? Write things in the comments!

Hope April 1st is treating you well!

Each of my Language Learning Journeys, Summarized Humorously in One Sentence Each

I’ll be posting something about my underaccomplishment with the 30-Day Challenge in Greenlandic in the coming days, but I thought it would be very humorous for me to try something else for a change.
By the way, my Fijian is getting FANTASTICALLY better with each coming day (I still have some blind spots that will be weeded out in the coming weeks, not also to mention the fact that I’ve been focusing mostly on speaking rather than listening or reading right now, given that I’ll be doing most of THAT when I’m in Fiji. Listening, reading and writing will no doubt follow, and I’m not even sure if writing exercises for Fijian would be effort ideally paid off because the only people I know who have lived in Fiji have been expats that only know a few words / sentences of Fijian.)

 

My list to be cleared with Fijian includes:

 

– numbers up until 1 billion

– FULLY mastering the complication plural pronouns (they come in four persons, singular, dual, paucal and plural — indicating 1, 2, a group and a BIG group)

– Family member words (significantly more complicated than in the languages of Western Europe)

– Grammatical kinks to be ironed out (especially politeness tiers and transitive suffixes on verbs).

 

Anyhow, you’ve come for humor so that’s what you’re getting. Please don’t take any of these too seriously 🙂

 

English – Even if you speak me natively, there will always be one proper noun that throws you off–so deal with it!

Ancient Hebrew – the closest a language ever got to resembling the mechanics of alphabet refrigerator magnets.

Bislama – Most people found out about this language through either a friend, a phrasebook or most likely of all…a Polandball meme!
Pijin – It’s Bislama without any French interjections. 🙂

Tok Pisin – What do you get when you cross Australian English with 800+ languages?

Trinidadian Creole English – Good luck trying to find written resources for this one.

German – The language that you realize is dangerously similar in many ways to Shakespeare’s English, but you only realize it if you’re beyond the intermediate stage.

Spanish – How many layers of slang would you like with your language? (I almost wrote “the language that people learn to say that they’re learning a language.”, but I decided against it. Or did I?)

Yiddish – you’d be surprised how much American English slang borrowed from me, but you’ll never know unless we spend quality time together.

Norwegian – exactly the linguistic kaleidoscope you would expect from a country that is 96% uninhabitable land.

Swedish – be prepared to learn EVERYTHING about syllable stress if you expect to be friends with me!

Danish – rumors of my difficulty have been very greatly exaggerated.

Icelandic – the language whose future everyone likes to freak out about.

Salone Krio – it’s like what American English would be if it were grammatically consistent, had regular spelling and made sense.

Hebrew – the language of the Bible, sprinkled with influence from French teachers, Russian emigres and American TV, among others.

Finnish – don’t let the big tables intimidate you, a lot of those forms you’ll almost never use in conversation.

Fijian – Wait, if there ARE enlongated vowels, how come they’re not written out? What do you mean, you’re just supposed to know? WHY?!!!?

Jamaican Patois – If you want to find out how open-minded someone REALLY is, mention the fact that you’re either learning this language or speak it fluently as an L2….be prepared!

Hungarian – Native speakers will love you for this…100% guarantee or your money back!

Polish – one of two langauges that caused me to nearly throw my computer in rage (the other one is below this one)

Greenlandic – How long do you like your words? 15 letter? 26 letters? 62 letters?

Lao – we disguised our Indo-European loan words really well. Come and find ’em!

Kiribati / Gilbertese – And you thought Dominican Spanish was fast.

Irish – Frightening learners with its orthography since time immemorial.

Myanmar / Burmese – There are four tones. Make that three tones. Make that two tones.

Tajik – Contrary to popular belief, Tajikistan is NOT a fictional country…Farsi’s little sibling lives there!

Palauan – Consonant jumble jamble!
Vincentian Creole English – I’m actually not a tonal language.

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